Canadian Parliament Takes a Bold Stance on Zombies


Now that Canada has clearly solved all social, economic and, political issues its government can finally settle in and solve the problem of all the damn zombies. Wednesday in the House of Commons (where government is made) Foreign Affairs Minister John Baird laid down the nations stance on the walking dead.

Canada will never be a safe haven for zombies.

This was in response to questions from an opposition MP grilling the minister on the countries Zombie preparedness. Yes. This actually happened. NDP MP Pat Martin started the political discourse of the dead with this.

“I don’t need to tell you, Mr. Speaker, that zombies don’t don’t recognize borders and that a zombie invasion in the United States can easily turn into a continent-wide pandemic if it is not contained, so on behalf of concerned Canadians everywhere, I want to ask the Minister for Foreign Affairs, is he working with his American counterparts to develop an international zombie strategy so that a zombie invasion does not turn into a zombie apocalypse?”

So rest easy Canadians, your government has everything under control. When the dead rise there will be no interruption of hockey. The bacon deliveries will all happen on time. Zombies will never overrun the great white North!

For the historians out there, we have provided video evidence of this historical declaration below. It’s like CSPAN, only more polite.

I am going to assume that one of the hot button topics in the next Canadian election will be dealing with the countries rampant CHUD problem.

Damn CHUDs.

Source: The National Post

Categories: Canada | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

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